[ Ratchet actually earns a grin for that, though it's back to a smirk pretty quick. Such is how Starscream just Is. ]
I'd like to see you try. Shall I just put it up on a high shelf? [ He snickers, indicating the height difference between them with a flourish. ] You'd have to get a step ladder.
It could always be worse. You could be shorter. I know of an Autobot that's barely nine feet tall; I'm surprised no one has tried to play ball with him yet. And that's not even mentioning my version of Soundwave's small army of cassettes.
[ He sniggers ]. I used to have a video of one of said cassettes WINNING a fight against my trinemate.
Well, maybe YOURS only has the one, but the one I know? You'll never guess how many of the little brats he's spawned.
[ He pauses, and then - too impatient to actually let Ratchet guess - just snickers a little and says it. ] Fourteen! Fourteen of the little fraggers! Some in very important positions on Cybertron too, for that matter.
[he opens his mouth to answer, then starscream jumps in ahead of him and his mouth just... stays hanging open.]
F... four... fourteen? [starscream has, undoubtedly, never seen a ratchet look so absolutely mortified and gobsmacked.] FOURTEEN?! I mean, the nepotism doesn't surprise me but fff....
Fourteen! Of course, most are working quite happily even without seeing their dear Soundwave all the time, but with mechs involved in policing, medicine, and one even in charge of a city-state at this point… Still very much his spawn. I could list them off, even. [ He gives Ratchet a cheeky little smirk. Teasing, more than anything else. ] Ratbat, Glit, Garboil, Ravage, Howlback…
Please stop listing them. Wait until we get to the bar first. [seems he semi-fell for it.] I don't know how he has the political energy for that. I mean, I was part of Megatron's protests before the war, but...
[he tilts his head.]
Wait, is yours still going? It is, right? Cybertron's alive?
It was more or less 'dead' at some point partway through the war; most of the mechs still planetside after the Ark and Nemesis left went into stasis to conserve energy. It was all gone. All the energon. Megatron had used it all the frag up. Even though we had complete control of Cybertron, it was USELESS!
[ He hisses a little at the memory. ] Shockwave was the only one left awake. But as the war picked up on Earth and Cybertron got... Displaced... The Autobots were able to send energon back, as did we- The OCCASIONAL time something actually went to fragging plan. Shockwave had better success intercepting Autobot shipments than we did securing energon of our own!
So yes, the planet is awake and alive again. Completely in Autobot control now, course, thanks to whatever the frag that last major engagement was. While my Seekers starve under a madman.
[ Unfortunately this has gotten somewhat personal very fast, but never let it be said that Starscream is not willing to rant about how much those later stages of the war still piss him the hell off. ]
[there's a lot there, but instead of focusing on their awful shared war history, ratchet figures there's something more important:] Look... any of 'em that show up here, they can have all the energon they want. Doctor's orders.
[ Starscream pauses, turning his head to just... Stare at Ratchet a little, before finally nodding. It's just- It's such a kind gesture, without strings or knives in the back, and for a moment the Seeker is at a loss for words. ]
[he casts starscream a genuine smile-- he means it. he means it, ratchet no longer has a reason to have any issue with the faction difference (unless optimus orders him to have one) and that besides he isn't comfortable with letting anyone suffer unduly.]
[ Well. Ratchet may just catch a bit of the same. More guarded, course - Starscream is a Decepticon - but still there. ]
I'm thinking the oil baths. Then I'm going flying, which you are welcome to watch. I'm due for a couple suborbital dives, anyway! Or maybe even go all the way to orbital...
I'll watch you to make sure you don't set yourself on fire, sure. [he says with a huff, though an oil bath sounds heavenly at the moment.] Why don't you invite Slipstream along with you?
I will not set myself on fire! I've done orbital drops hundreds of times before, often in worse conditions than I'm sure we'll find on some pretty vacation planet. I'm one of the few Seekers from my world who can break orbit, you know.
[ Starscream gives Ratchet a sly little look at that. ] Oh, I'm sure she's got her own plans. But I may drop in on her, who knows?
Uh-huh. I've worked on jets and fliers, but not really seekers specifically. [he doesn't need to elaborate on that, that autobot fliers and decepticon ones are different. well, and the war. it's not like he had easy access.] Explore for anything specific?
Energon, mostly, or fuel sources that could be converted. Oh, you'd get some other requests here and there, particularly for any planets with lots of metal deposits, or rare materials. But energon was always the pressing concern.
That's what I primarily studied at the University of Iacon, you know. Energon production.
Yeah? Guess you might need to put that degree to use if we end up stuck in deep space for long enough.
[he does his little handstand-spin transform into his altmode rather abruptly, though it's clear that they're getting close to the docking point to disembark.]
Already have. There's an energon convertor in the labs, just about ready to go. First one is for the Brigade, course. Then as soon as I can source enough parts, I have to make another for... An ally.
If only the parts weren't so fragging hard to find.
[ He moves closer to the door, giving Ratchet enough room to drive out. But he's not about to transform to his own alternate mode, not in here. ]
[he wouldn't expect starscream to-- when ratchet is out the ship he transforms back into root mode to look around, looking genuinely delighted at everything.]
Hold that thought. [he bolts forward and skids to a stop on the sand, picking up handfuls and laughing brightly.] It glitters! That's so tacky, I love it!
[ Starscream rolls his optics, but sniggers and pulls out his communicator at the sight. Ratchet, playing in the sand and still wearing those ridiculous glasses? It's perfect. ]
Hold still, hm? [ And the little bastard snaps a picture. ]
HEY! [his entire face goes bright blue as he drops the sand and falls backwards onto his ass, scrabbling behind the closest rock.] NO PICTURES! 50 SHANIX FOR A PICTURE!
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I'd like to see you try. Shall I just put it up on a high shelf? [ He snickers, indicating the height difference between them with a flourish. ] You'd have to get a step ladder.
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[ He sniggers ]. I used to have a video of one of said cassettes WINNING a fight against my trinemate.
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[ He pauses, and then - too impatient to actually let Ratchet guess - just snickers a little and says it. ] Fourteen! Fourteen of the little fraggers! Some in very important positions on Cybertron too, for that matter.
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F... four... fourteen? [starscream has, undoubtedly, never seen a ratchet look so absolutely mortified and gobsmacked.] FOURTEEN?! I mean, the nepotism doesn't surprise me but fff....
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[he tilts his head.]
Wait, is yours still going? It is, right? Cybertron's alive?
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It was more or less 'dead' at some point partway through the war; most of the mechs still planetside after the Ark and Nemesis left went into stasis to conserve energy. It was all gone. All the energon. Megatron had used it all the frag up. Even though we had complete control of Cybertron, it was USELESS!
[ He hisses a little at the memory. ] Shockwave was the only one left awake. But as the war picked up on Earth and Cybertron got... Displaced... The Autobots were able to send energon back, as did we- The OCCASIONAL time something actually went to fragging plan. Shockwave had better success intercepting Autobot shipments than we did securing energon of our own!
So yes, the planet is awake and alive again. Completely in Autobot control now, course, thanks to whatever the frag that last major engagement was. While my Seekers starve under a madman.
[ Unfortunately this has gotten somewhat personal very fast, but never let it be said that Starscream is not willing to rant about how much those later stages of the war still piss him the hell off. ]
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I- ...Good. Good.
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Where did you want to go first?
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I'm thinking the oil baths. Then I'm going flying, which you are welcome to watch. I'm due for a couple suborbital dives, anyway! Or maybe even go all the way to orbital...
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[ Starscream gives Ratchet a sly little look at that. ] Oh, I'm sure she's got her own plans. But I may drop in on her, who knows?
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[he is not subtle at all about how he glances around starscream's
assback to see his engines.]Your thrusters look just the same as the other seekers I've seen. What makes you special?
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Modified them myself! There's a lot more power behind them despite their appearance, I can promise you that; I used to do interstellar exploration.
Before the war.
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That's what I primarily studied at the University of Iacon, you know. Energon production.
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[he does his little handstand-spin transform into his altmode rather abruptly, though it's clear that they're getting close to the docking point to disembark.]
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If only the parts weren't so fragging hard to find.
[ He moves closer to the door, giving Ratchet enough room to drive out. But he's not about to transform to his own alternate mode, not in here. ]
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Hold that thought. [he bolts forward and skids to a stop on the sand, picking up handfuls and laughing brightly.] It glitters! That's so tacky, I love it!
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Hold still, hm? [ And the little bastard snaps a picture. ]
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[ Starscream cackles, loud and unashamed in his cheekiness. What a bastard! ]
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